Last weekend was a pretty meaningful weekend for our church. (In case you are wondering, I'm rooted in City Harvest Church Kuala Lumpur.)
Other than having our pledge weekend for our 8th Arise and Build, Pastor also took this opportunity to announce the new Zone/Sub Zone/Cell Group structure of our church.
He introduces all the Zone Leaders, Subzone Leaders and Cell Group Leaders on stage. Is pretty awesome to see all the leaders who are the backbone of our church and getting the whole church to pray for them.
Stolen from Adele Chow's FB
After service, someone asked me "So, when are you going to be a Cell Group Leader (CGL)?" I looked at her, shocked to hear that question but I laughed and said "Impossible for it to happen in the near future."
Ok. Just in case I presented it wrongly, I wasn't offended by the question and my respond was sincere. Because I really don't see myself being a cell group leader (yet, if ever).
But to be honest, if this question had been asked years ago, I would be bitter because back then I wanted to be a CGL. I still remember it clearly how badly I wanted to be in the leader's team. I always admire those who share the Word of God and always in the "inner circle" of the leadership team. And on top of that, I love love love preaching/ sharing the Word of God.
Long long long ago, I always imagine myself preaching and sharing God's word. When I'm listening to someone preaching, I will imagine myself sharing the same message in my own unique style. Sometimes, I even go to the extend of re-writing a message that I heard over the weekend! A bit crazy, I know!
I just love the image of me sharing from the bible and everyone else have to keep quiet and listen. I love the idea of how awesome it will be to speak words that impact people's life. Owh! Being a CGL was my dream!
But boy were I naive back then! Being a CGL is not merely about preaching! But is to be a shepherd to all sort of sheep. Fat sheep, skinny sheep, OKU sheep, black sheep, you just name it and you will have it!
A CGL need to take care of all the different needs from different people. The demand comes from all sort of sizes and colors. And the best thing is, it will come whenever they like. Morning la, afternoon la, evening la, night la, during your honey moon la. There's no limit to it!
And if you have a member like me, you'll probably need a very good insurance just in case of any heart attacks!
I spoke to leaders who are not disappointed but heart-broken by their members. I see them giving all their time and energy to talk and "just-be-there" for their members. I see them loving and loving again no matter how painful it might be.
CGL is not a title. Is not just someone who comes every week to share from the bible (which is not easy also) and say bye bye. But CGL is someone who walk with others all the time. They are constantly giving yet never gives up. They are those who keep loving and risk having their heart broken again. To be a good CGL is not easy, is not like playing masak-masak or play-doh. Is even more hardcore than a mission trip to Myanmar.
To those CGLs out there, I respect you guys a lot. Forgive me as I never knew how hard it is until I saw the tears in your eyes. Thank you for giving, loving and all your sacrifices.
To those who hate CGLs. I've been there, done that and almost made a movie out of it. Is really not easy to be a CGL. And just think about it, they don't have to do it yet they took the responsibility on their shoulder and try their best. No one is perfect, just like us.
As for the big question whether I want to be a CGL. My answer will be:
"Yes, if God's grace is upon me!"
Seriously, is not easy!
Love,
Constance
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