Oh! Bye!

I hate making friends.

Yup. You read it correctly. 

I hate making friends.

Like any other relationships, making friends requires time and efforts.

And like any other relationship, it does not guarantee a return but subject to hurts and disappointments; sometimes back stabbing and also betrayal. But that's another story to tell.

I learned it the hard way that friends no matter how good they are, are not perfect.

Some way or another, they will do something to hurt you and your heart will bleed like crazy.

Though I've been saying recently, we do not have to care what is outside of our control because is outside of our control. 

But I got to admit this time, it hurts.

I don't really make friends. I mean real friends.

I'm good in saying hi(s) and bye(s).

But when it comes to real genuine friendship I'm an idiot.

Because I'm afraid of getting hurt and I do not want to waste my time (aka life) on people who will even leave me.

But when I do open up my life, I OPEN UP my life.

I share thoughts, past and dreams.

I spend time and put in the effort to make things work out.

I don't mind giving and not receiving.

What I mind is my heart getting hurt.

More than one month ago, I started being very close to one of my colleagues (Let's call her RG).

She's super funny and I like to tease her.

She shared her story and I shared my life.

I was super excited about us and what's ahead of this friendship.

What I didn't expect is a big bomb from her.

Few days ago when we celebrated July's babies birthday at the office, the HOD announced that RG tendered her resignation letter and will be leaving end of this month.

When we heard it, we were all shocked! None of us knew about it.

Of course she gave her explanation saying that she did not want us to react the way we did and she do not want to affect her work on our company's big event last weekend.

Though I understand where she comes from, but to me it was all bullshit.

The fact that she kept it a secret snatched away any chance we could have to spend more time with her.

And no matter when she breaks the news to us, we will still give the same reaction.

The most ironic part is that morning itself she told me she will still be here next year for our company's big event. I couldn't have felt more cheated and lied to.

She totally reminds me why I hate making new friends.

Because I hate bye(s).

Some people even leave without saying goodbye.

But I guess God wants me to learn something.

No matter what, every relationship will have its risk.

The question is, will you take it or not?

But thank God that in all that might happen in a relationship, He will never change.

Though people come and go, He will never leave.

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