What's your story?

There’s this story that is stuck in my mind ever since I read it a few days ago.

It goes something like this.

Everyone was quiet and minding their own business in a train coach. Suddenly came in a father with his 2 children. The father found a sit and sat while his children were making a lot of noise and were disturbing the other passengers on board. Everyone was obviously annoyed by the kids but the father did nothing and just sat there. The passenger next to him couldn't take it anymore and talked to him. “Sir, don’t you think that your children are disturbing the other passengers?”. The father looked up and said something that blow my mind away. “Sorry, I didn't notice. Their mother just passed away an hour ago, I still don’t know how to react, I guess they are too.”

What I’ve learned is this, you will always think other people is in fault until you listened to their stories. 

Because we are all brought up in such a way that we pre judge others and make our own assumptions. 

If we’ve never heard the father’s reply, we will never know what they’ve been through and we will come to our own conclusion that they are inconsiderate people. 

But when we hear his part of the story, we are the one who are being inconsiderate.

Before my participation in #LoveKL project, I always had the assumption that those who sleep along the streets are those who are lazy and useless.

I have the presumption that they are their own reason that they have “failed” in life.

All these mindset came from years after years of what other had told me.

In their defends, I think their intention is good.

Maybe they just want to make sure I’ll be hardworking and not waste my life “like them”.

But the truth is, when I listened to their stories, is not what I thought it was.

These people, not all had failed in life.

Not all of them are lazy and useless and happily choose to stay homeless.

Imagine with me for a second.

Given a choice, would you want to live at the roadside with rats and cockroaches, worrying for your own safety and health day and night?

I’m pretty sure your answer will be no.

I can only imagine the mental torment and struggle each of them have to go through before they decide to stay homeless and sleep at the roadside.

You need more courage to sleep on the streets day after day than to go back home everyday.

So what’s make them put themselves in this position?

Have you ever wonder?

Is it really as what we’ve believe that all of them are lazy and useless?

Have you taken time to listen to their stories before making your own conclusion based on OTHER’s experience?

I wonder how often we’ve lived our life believing what we’ve believe just because we’ve brought up in such a way and culture.

I myself am guilty of this.

And I do not what to miss out the opportunity to listen to other’s story anymore.

I listen, not because I want “supporting documents” to support my own believes.

I listen, because I know everybody is unique in their experience and there’s no need to draw a general conclusion on personal issues.

And this applies to every other controversial personal issues as well.

When people do things differently from us, is very dangerous for us not to make any effort to understand.

We then conclude that they CHOOSE to be that way.

But have you ever asked yourself, did they?

Why would they?

What’s their story?

Don’t think that all stories are excuses, is their real life experience that even when you deny it, they can’t.

Speaking from my own experience, there are people who are not interested in your stories.

They just want to collect enough “data” to support their own beliefs.

They will ask question, twist your words and make you believe that what they believe is right.

This is so so so sad.

Because by doing this, we missed out the chance to know a person better and open our eyes to see things differently.

If everything in the world look the same, the world aren’t pretty anymore.

Embrace differences and include everyone in this journey we call life. :]